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She’s the 100m record holder and the first openly gay sportsperson in India. I guess she knows a thing or two about being first. I’m so proud of her.
Tomorrow, @WillSmith is making wishes come true in my new game "Rub My Lamp." You heard me.
Animals are so smart. They would never have let Jon go back to the Night’s Watch.
I sent Kevin the Cashier to the very last Blockbuster. Not sure they’re going to want him back.
#BigLittleLies is coming back! Amazing little @ReeseWitherspoon told me all about it.
@ReeseWitherspoon thought she was better friends with Jennifer Aniston. Poor, sweet, misguided Reese. Tomorrow.
Someone is jealous of Charlie.
I can’t believe Keanu Reeves does his own stunts. How did he move so slow in "The Matrix"?!
@KrisJenner gave me a cold. Worse than that, I now owe her 10% of my NyQuil.